Super Bonus Edition! UPenn endowment shrinks drastically (not like that!)
It pains me to link to this crappy newspaper, but in the interest of journalistic freedom we will do so. Due to the omnipresent shitty economy, it looks like UPenn is getting hit in the pocketbook.
“Penn’s endowment dropped 19.4 percent in the first half of the current fiscal year, falling from $6.2 billion to $5 billion from July to December 2008, according to Executive Vice President Craig Carnaroli.”
Cry me a river. While that’s a nice chunk of change to lose, don’t start pulling out your checkbooks for poor old UPenn. Let’s think about this for a second…five billion dollars? Like, woah. I guess they can buy whatever they want. But let’s all hope that their economic policy wonks at Wharton keep messing up this “market based economy” thing. Lately at least one UPenn econ professor has been distracted by having sex with little boys. (“Investigators uncovered child pornography in the Penn office of Wharton professor emeritus Scott Ward yesterday, piling fresh charges on top of allegations that he brought child pornography into the country.”) If only we could make this shit up.
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